Power play (or power exchange) is when two people have beautifully symbiotic desires. The submissive craves the freedom of surrender, and the Dominant craves the feeling of taking charge.

But being a great Dominant in the bedroom isn’t just about doing whatever you want! True Dominance isn’t rooted in control for its own sake—it’s about co-creating an experience where both partners feel fulfilled and safe.

Kink is a consensual play of power - you can only “take” the power that has been joyfully, willingly, and trustingly given. Great kink is not just taking control. It’s creating mind-blowing experiences that allow both of you to experience your fantasies with safety and trust. 

Stepping into your Dominance or submission can feel daunting. But like any skill, it can be learned and practised. So, if you’re ready to explore, here are is an ultimate toolkit to help you, including:

• Kink and BDSM definitions

• Yes/No/Maybe kink lists

• Pre-Negotiation and ‘RBDSMA’ worksheets

• The Traffic Light System and safe word worksheet

• The Four Power Play Embodiment tools 

• Embodiment rituals for getting into your mind and body

• Fantasy Journaling to help you come up with ideas

• Scene Planning Worksheet

• Aftercare and Debrief Worksheet

 I have also included other resources at the end of this worksheet to help you continue your learning and reading!

This is not to replace proper kink and BDSM education. Do your research, read appropriate resources, and where appropriate receive appropriate training and education from an expert so that you can learn how to play safely. Feel free to book in a session for more support.

Alice x