Sex Benefits of Kegels

Reviewed by Alice Child, Somatic Sexologist

Somatic Sexologist Alice Child explains the pelvic floor exercises (AKA 'Kegels') and why they can improve your sex life.

This guide contains general advice only. If you need more tailored support, please book in a session.

Kegels can be a game changer for your sex life - think stronger orgasms, heightened sensations, and total control over your pleasure!

Let's talk kegels! What are they and why are they important for sexual wellness, health and pleasure?

What are Pelvic Floor Muscles?

The pelvic floor is a group of muscles and ligaments that stretch like a hammock from your pubic bone to your tailbone. They play a vital role in supporting your bladder, bowel, and uterus. It helps control functions like urination, bowel movement, and sexual response. While it’s most often talked about in relation to women, everyone has a pelvic floor — and keeping it healthy is equally important.

A healthy pelvic floor supports core stability and overall pelvic health, but when these muscles are weak or hold tension, it can lead to issues like incontinence, pelvic pain, or reduced sexual sensation. Like any other muscle group, the pelvic floor can be strengthened and maintained through regular exercises.

What are Kegels?

Kegels are exercises designed to strengthen the pelvic floor. A simple way to find those muscles is by trying to stop and start the flow of your pee midstream. The more kegel exercises you do, the stronger your pelvic floor muscles become. 

What are Reverse Kegels?

Reverse kegels are the opposite of regular kegels—they focus on consciously relaxing and lengthening the pelvic floor muscles instead of tightening them. These exercises help release tension and improve blood flow, which can be beneficial for people who hold too much tension or experience pelvic pain.

What are Kegel Stones or Balls?

It’s a common misconception, but kegel stones and exercisers aren’t technically sex toys. They’re pelvic floor trainers, designed to help strengthen your pelvic floor muscles. They usually consist of one or two weighted balls on a string that can be inserted into the vagina. You then gently ‘grip’ against them with your pelvic floor muscles helping you strengthen them. You can do kegel exercises with or without these to help you.  

What are the benefits of Kegels?

• Stronger, more powerful, pleasurable orgasms

• Reduced risk of prolapse (e.g after pregnancy)

• Can help people get out of their head and back into their body when they get distracted

• Feeling of ‘tighter’ sex

• Can help reduce pelvic floor tightness (vaginismus) which can lead to painful sex

• Can help with difficulty orgasming or delayed ejaculation

• Reverse kegels can help you last longer/overcome premature ejaculation

• Can also help with erectile difficulty

• Better control of your bladder and bowel

• Can increase sensation/help with numbness/lack of sensation

• Overall helps you feel more in control of your arousal/sensation/pleasure 

For support with exercises that are designed for your area of concern, book in a session with me.

How do you use Kegel balls?

• Apply a small amount of water-based lube 

• Insert the ball into the entrance of your vagina while you are standing up or lying down. Do not push inwards like you would do with a tampon, but leave it right inside the entrance. 

• Grip against the ball with your kegel muscles - and attempt to move the ball up and inwards with your muscles! You may notice the string get shorter.

• Relax your muscles, and you might notice the ball move downwards 

• Repeat! Aim to work up to about 8 - 10 contractions, but it’s okay to start small at 1 - 2 contractions 

• Don't forget to breathe normally throughout and don’t hold your breath 

• Aim to do these 2 - 3 times per week

  
  

Where do I get some?

Par Femme has a beautiful silicone AHH Kegel Set, which is perfect for beginners and experienced kegel users. They are soft and easy to insert, and come with different weights so you can progress to a heavier weight when you are ready. They are easy to clean, waterproof, and body-safe. 10/10 recommend!

When will I notice change?

Everyone is different, but with regular practice you’ll start to notice improvements in your pelvic floor strength in around 6-8 weeks. For some, if the pelvic muscles were quite weak to begin with, progress might take a little longer. Like any exercise, consistency is key — the more regularly you do them, the more likely you are to feel the benefits.

If you're not sure where to begin, book in a session with me for some guidance.

Best,

Alice x

Alice Child - Somatic Sexologist, Sex Therapy & Sex Counsellor - helps people achieve happier and healthier sex lives through 1:1 sex coaching, couples sex counselling, hens parties, and workshops. Book a session here.